Ohio?? How did you end up in Ohio? I haven’t heard a lot of stories that begin in Ireland and end in Columbus. How did that happen?
Why, a woman, of course! I was working in a bar in Ireland when an American tourist came in. It was a quiet night, so we spent some hours chatting. She went back to the states the next day, but on my birthday, she sent me a 3-month return plane ticket. I never ended up using the return part of it.
That’s ridiculously romantic. Seriously ridiculous. If people don’t groan from that story, they should (but seriously it’s awesome and most would punch you from romantic jealousy). Tell me one intresting surprise difference between your home and this odd place – some part of the dialect, an odd animal or living situation…
Romantic right up until the divorce. Such is life though.
Birds. The robin here is the size of a Thanksgiving turkey. Ours is the size of a sparrow. We have puffins too, cliff dwellers that have to be the cutest creatures on earth. They look like little David Schwimmers, only a lot less dull.
Also, people don’t high-five in Ireland. Or at least they didn’t when I left. They probably do now thanks to a new generation who seem to be trying desperately hard to be American.
What do you have in your pockets?
My iPhone, wallet, and a bunch of book store receipts.
There are lots of photos of you floating around on the internet where you’re completely green. That question sort of asks itself…
I’m the jealous type.
Don’t bail on that question! Explain the green!
Okay, okay. Those are shots from my role in SLIME CITY MASSACRE, a gory splatfest follow up to Greg Lamberson’s cult classic SLIME CITY. I spent a lot of time in monster makeup, which I loved, though the removal process took a lot of my face away with it. All in the name of fun.
What was your first job?
Waiter in a seafront hotel. I hated every minute of it, and the boss was a tyrant. It’s actually going to be the basis for my next horror novel.
What did you doodle on your notebooks/desks in middle school?
I doodled lyrics from rock songs on my desk, or added to existing drawings that had been etched there over the decades. Our desks were always ancient.
Do you know who The Enigma is? Not from the comic books, the guy with the jigsaw full-body tattoo. And the Lizard Man? Who wins in coolness between the two?
I’d have to go with The Enigma, though I think they’re both nuts. I have four tattoos and would consider more, but there’s a line, man. I’m oddly shaped enough without paying to make it worse.
Do you dress up for Halloween every year?
I always plan to, but never do. I just get too wrapped up in the planning of the annual parties to remember the costume. I did go naked one year, but that was only because I was lazy and broke.
Did you win the Costume Contest?
I did not win the costume contest. Nobody but the cops showed up.